Dying Matters Staffordshire
Why ‘pushing up daisies’ isn’t helpful
Few of us are comfortable talking about dying and death. Look at the sheer number of phrases we use to avoid discussing it openly. We ‘kick the bucket’, ‘pop our clogs’, ‘peg it’, ‘pass away’; we seldom simply ‘die’.
It’s time to talk.
Making time to have honest conversations about your end of life wishes is important. And the best time to do it is while you are well.
Have these discussions now and you are more likely to get the care you want, have the best possible quality of life and might be able to spend your final time where and how you’d like.
On the other hand, if you don’t make your wishes known then the chances are they won’t be fulfilled. For those closest to you this can make a deeply troubling time even more stressful. They could be left worrying, or even arguing, about decisions they have to make on your behalf.
Sadly, a quarter of deaths are unexpected. Any one of us could go from being very well to the final stages of life in a very short time. So have that chat now; it always seems too early, until it’s too late.
What can I do?
Explore the Dying Matters website.
You’ll find a wealth of advice, leaflets, personal blogs etc. Here are a few suggestions:
Learn from other's experiences
Work with your community
People often speak more openly about dying when they are in an informal group. It’s an approach that’s proved successful across the country.
If you want to start your own discussion sessions as part of an existing community group, or even as a brand new venture, we are developing a couple of documents which will help:
- An A5 booklet giving community leaders advice on how to set up and run a group
- Two A4 ‘write-on’ event posters
- A4/A5 promotional flier
- Three A4 campaign posters (bucket, daisies and parrot)
Dying Matters Awareness Week events:
Palliative Care Conference. University Hospitals of North Midlands NHS Trust & Douglas Macmillan Hospice. The Moat House, Festival Park. Search ‘UHNM’ Tickets cost £75
‘Homeward Bound’ - A play about relationships, love, compassion and empathy at end of life. Free Entry, open to public, staff and students.
12.45-1.45. University Hospitals of North Midlands NHS Trust. Katharine House Business Centre Unit 1, Priestly Court Staffordshire Technology Park Stafford ST18 0LQ.
15.30 -17.00. University Hospitals of North Midlands NHS Trust. Lecture theatre, Undergraduate Medical School, Royal Stoke Hospital, ST4 6QG.
Death Café. 5pm - 7pm (time to be confirmed) Central Midlands Co-op Age UK Burton. Brewhouse Arts Centre, Union Street, Burton upon Trent, DE14 1AA. This event is open to everyone, it’s free of charge and an opportunity to talk all things death
14th May to 18th May
Grave Talks discussion each day by Martin Hill. St Giles Hospice Fisherwick Road Whittington Lichfield WS14 9LH - Day Hospice. St Giles Spiritual Lead Martin Hill will be hosting Grave Talk sessions in the St Giles Day Hospice each day throughout the week, helping patients and carers to discuss matters about dying.
14th May to 20th May
Dying Matters Information. All Week. Sandy Lane Health Centre Sandy Lane Rugeley. This will include a selection of Dying Matters leaflets, St Giles information and our 2017 Conversation Board which displays our community’s thoughts around “What makes their lives worthwhile”
Virtual Autopsy. 12-2.30 Lunch 12pm to 12.30pm Event 12.30-2.30pm. North Staffs Medical Institute, Hartshill, Stoke on Trent.
Dying Matters information day. All day. Sutton Coldfield Supportive Care Centre Lindridge Road, Sutton. This will include several local charities on hand to talk about their services as well as a range of information on Dying Matters.
“Help Point Get Together “- all our Help Point volunteers meet at hospice for chat over tea/coffee. St Giles Hospice Fisherwick Road Whittington Lichfield WS14 9LH. This is an opportunity for them to meet each other, look at challenges and hear from one of our attendees who will talk about how the help point has made a difference to her.
15th, 18th and 19th May
Pop up Shop. All day, each day. Tamworth town centre. Experts from many fields of death, dying and bereavement to chat to the public, calm fears, destroy myths and generally drink tea, coffee and eat biscuits. We are also hoping the coffin will reappear for further decoration. Friday is market day in Tamworth and we will be looking for those shoppers to join us for tea, coffee and a chat and as always be on hand to answer their questions, queries and requests.
Talk on wills an lasting power of attorney. 10.30 - 11.30am. Douglas McMillian Hospice Barlaston Road, Blurton,Stoke on Trent, Staffs, ST3 3NZ. https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/talk-on-wills-an-lasting-power-of-attorney-tickets-44917973869 Been thinking about making a will ? Confused about power of attorney ? Unsure what to do to plan for the future ? Come along and hear from the experts at Beswicks Legal about all you need to know about wills and power of attorney.
Open Day at Hokinson Lovatt and Wooton Funeral Directors with Tea and Cake. 12.30pm -2pm. 15 Chetwynd Street, Wolstanton, Newcastle-under-Lyme, Staffordshire, ST5 0EQ. https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/open-day-at-hokinson-lovatt-and-wooton-funeral-directors-tickets-44919956800 Hopkinson Lovatt and Wooton welcome you to Hopkinson House for their open day. This a family run funeral directors which was established in 1820, hear about the history, the role of the organisation in the local community. Ask all the questions that you wanted to ask about funerals and hear about planning for the future. Come along for an interesting afternoon with tea, coffee and the best homemade cakes.
Understanding Bereavement Workshop session for local employers. At lunch time on Wednesday, Uttoxeter Cares in Holly Road, Uttoxeter will be hosting an Understanding Bereavement in the Workplace taster session. Local companies will be invited to come along for a spot of lunch and to hear about the work we do around support companies to support their staff and colleagues to support each other through bereavement. Again, a free event for any organisation wanting to offer their employees that extra support.
Pop Up Shop in Newcastle. 10.00 - 16.00. Newcastle Market next to the Guildhall. One thing in life is certain...we’re all going to die! Join us for conversations about death, dying and bereavement and find out more about plans you might like to make in advance about your own end of life.
Arts for Life. 5-8pm. St Giles Hospice Fisherwick Road Whittington Lichfield WS14 9LH. Our key event of the week is an Arts and Craft Exhibition at the hospice entitled ‘Arts for Life’. Art and Craft play a huge part in hospice life, from providing therapy for our Day Hospice patients to helping bereaved young people through difficult times. We also work in partnership with some fabulous organisation, including Lichfield Society of Arts, Bramshall Art Group and they will be displaying their work too. We will also have work from Elswick Nursery, Whittington Primary School and John Taylor High School as well as work created by our Phoenix Children and Young Person’s Peer Support Group. There will be other surprises on the night too, including music by world renowned violinist Darin Qualls. The exhibition runs from 4pm till 8pm and is free for anyone to attend. It’s an opportunity to promote Dying Matters week and also engage with people in the hospice.
'In your shoes’ end of life care event. 2.30-4.30pm. County Hospital, Room 1, Postgraduate Medical Centre. Contact Ruth Jones on 01785 887678 to book. Have you lost a loved one in the last two years who was cared for at Royal Stoke or County Hospital? Share your experiences with us to help improve the care we give to relatives.
'In your shoes’ end of life care event 2.30-4.30pm. Royal Stoke Hospital, Trust Boardroom, Springfield Building, Royal Stoke Hospital. Contact Ruth Jones on 01785 887678 to book
Dead or Alive Quiz. 7.30-10pm. Bowling Club London Road Trent Vale. https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/dead-or-alive-quiz-night-tickets-44922090181 Time to get stuck in. Bring your quiz team, dead or alive, and test the old grey matter. Teams with a maximum of six come along and test your knowledge of all things death and dying and win some great prizes.
Dying Matters Awareness Week Coffee Morning. 11am -2pm. Broom Street Resource Centre, Hanley, ST1 2EW. A coffee morning to raise awareness of end of life, palliative care and bereavement amongst adults with learning disabilities, their loved ones and carers.
Death Café. 11am -2pm. Chaplaincy Team Prayer Centre, Royal Stoke Hospital. ‘Living with dying-Sometimes it’s hard to talk about the things that matter to us the most. We are here to support- why not join us for a drink and a cake?’
An open day where people can view the services on offer, have a tour of the crematorium and speak to experts on all things funeral. Cruse Bereavement Care and Bretby Crematorium. An open day where people can view the services on offer, have a tour of the crematorium and speak to experts on all things funeral.
Pop Up Shop in Hanley. 10.00-16.00. Tontine Square Hanley Stoke-On-Trent ST1 1NP. One thing in life is certain...we’re all going to die! Join us for conversations about death, dying and bereavement and find out more about plans you might like to make in advance about your own end of life.
Public Talks on Work of Anatomy School and whole Body Donation. 2 tours 10-12 and 1-3. School of Medicine, David Weatherall Building, Keele University, Staffordshire, ST5 5BG.
The Anatomy Lab at Keele University Medical School invite you along to talk about the work of the laboratory and its role in medical education. The talk will also cover body donation and how the bequeathal of a body after death can create opportunities for the education of students.
Clinical Tours of the Anatomy Labs. 2 tours 10-12 and 1-3. School of Medicine, David Weatherall Building, Keele University, Staffordshire, ST5 5BG. https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/e/clinical-tours-of-the-anatomy-labs-keele-university-tickets-44921353979
The Anatomy Lab at Keele University Medical School invite you along to a tour of the lab and a talk about the work of the laboratory and its role in medical education., Note that you will be given a tour of working anatomy laboratory where human bodies and body parts are used for medical education and you will need to provide proof that you work within the NHS/Social Care to take part in this tour.
Staffordshire Health and Wellbeing Board